…the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall … (Matthew 7v25)

The second cycle of chemo was really horrible for the first week, but Phoebe is improving again now.  In the first few days her lovely face was so swollen that she could barely open her eyes; I thought my heart would break when I visited her last Sunday (isolation started on Monday) and Rachel and I took her to the park in her wheelchair.  The brass band music was too loud for her, her thighs were aching, she was too tired to complete her favourite activity in the museum (making a monster on the computer!) and we went back to her room so that she could have some painkillers.  She and Rachel lay on the bed and Phoebe was soon asleep.

If I as her grandma feel so sad about all this, just try to imagine the heartache for Rachel and Matt.  Although they are clinging on to the Lord, every day is very hard for them and I do ask those of you who pray, to keep on asking for the daily courage and trust they need to live through these days.  As Jesus’s story about the wise and foolish men reminds us, it is those who are hearing and living out his words who find their lives survive the storm.

This is Rachel’s update on Facebook today:

So the start of cycle 2 has been really rough, but at last I feel that Phoebe is herself again...enjoying colouring, stories, crafts, films etc. Yesterday she even managed a few minutes dancing! Tomorrow is another day of chemo drugs so please pray this doesn't knock her back too much, and then it's the slow road to recovery as we wait for her to gradually regain immunity. In this time please pray that she can begin to tolerate more food and that she wouldn't get any infections along the way. Thanks.

Reuben’s nursery has closed now for the summer holidays, so my days with him will start a little earlier from now on.  Grandpa is returning from Madagascar on Wednesday, and will be joining me in all our fun activities!  We are taking Reuben to a family party in Surrey soon, and then going on to spend a few days with buckets and spades at Weymouth, which is where all four Lollars were planning to be for their summer holiday, before we had any inkling what this year held in store.

Chemo round 2 and the bigger picture

Matt's Facebook update gives you an idea of the sorts of things they are
dealing with on a regular basis:

After 5 lovely days home we are back in hospital for Phoebe's second cycle
of chemo. Thank you all for messages, prayers and for respecting our wishes
to keep clear unless invited around.

A week ago today Phoebe had an MRI scan to check for tumours and the tumour
site for any growth and we are thrilled that everything looks perfect up to
now. Scans will be done regularly to monitor whether treatment is effective
or not. Each of these MRIs make us nervous as we wait to hear the results.
Should any growth occur at the former tumour site or any other brain tumours
develop, treatment options are virtually non-existent.

Please pray that Phoebe would get through this cycle of chemo as quickly as
the last, that the drugs' side effects would be minimal and their
effectiveness maximum!!

We've noticed Phoebe has become rather 'spaced out', struggling to
concentrate and less responsive than usual. This could be a side effect of
her anti-sickness drugs or a longer term effect of radiotherapy which can
permanently reduce cognitive functioning. Please pray we'd adapt our
expectations of her accordingly and remain patient.

Please continue to pray for us, Helen and Katie as we care for Phoebe during
this cycle, and also for for mum (Jen) as she cares for Reuben.
Big hugs y'all!

In-patient again

Today (Thursday) Phoebe has returned to Sheffield Children’s Hospital for the second cycle of chemo to begin.  I am back on duty with Reuben and Rachel and Matt will spend most of the day with Phoebe, taking it in turns to return home for tea and sleeping, and taking Reuben to nursery next morning.

It was very special to have Phoebe home for a few days, there were no medical problems apart from having to pop back to the hospital to have a new nasal tube fitted.  There was a continual refrain of “have a drink Phoebe”, and sometimes Reuben needed reminding why Phoebe is asked “what would you like to try eating?” while the rest of us eat what is put in front of us!

Rachel and I have both had preliminary appointments with Cavendish Cancer Care, a Sheffield based charity that supports cancer patients and their families.  They offer counselling, relaxation classes etc, and the client can choose (free of charge) what they feel will help.  As they have specialist help for children, I am hoping to be advised on how best to play and chat with Reuben to help him express his no doubt mixed emotions – confusion, fear, anger?

Having learnt (the hard way) while I was helping my sisters care for our elderly mother that I am not superwoman, I am seeking to be wise and not aiming to achieve much more than caring well for Reuben.  I was feeling rather defeated by our garden where the weeds are taking over, until kind friends in our church Life Group started doing some weeding – and even planted beetroot!  This has inspired me to do the occasional ten minutes myself and I feel less daunted now.

Thank you so much for following the blog and supporting us all with your prayers, I cannot tell you how much this means to us.

More rejoicing!

Today (Friday) is a special day! Phoebe has done so well recovering from her first cycle of chemo that she has been allowed to come home for a few days!  She will need to attend a couple of clinics on Monday and Tuesday but otherwise won’t be an inpatient again until Thursday (9th) when cycle #2 of chemo begins (unless she becomes unwell before then).
Thank you all so much for your prayers. We really do put this amazing recovery down to the Lord's kindness in answering the prayers of his children.

It's important to say Phoebe is still very weak and quite frail but her immunity is back and her platelet count is continuing to rise. This time at home will be very slow paced and relaxed. People are being asked to resist the temptation to drop in unless invited/arranged as we still want to limit the risks of her catching something from people, especially children!

What a joy it was this afternoon to sit under the garden umbrella with Phoebe and Reuben, our feet dangling in the paddling pool, reading a story and making sure we all had a sip of water each time a page was turned!  Her two school teachers called in too and it was lovely to see their obvious affection for Phoebe.


Wonderful though all this is, please do pray for Matt and Rachel who, without medical supervision, are responsible for Phoebe’s medication, nutrition and hydration.  They need continued wisdom too, in helping the children to manage the change in circumstances – it must seem that as soon as we get used to something, it changes and different dynamics ensue.  But we are so grateful to God for this oasis and pray that the four of them will have a very special time together.